No Matter How It Ends, It Was An Experience.

LONG, but necessary post.

It is with great sadness that I begin to write this post today. You are about to get a very vulnerable, but honest side of me. And a little inside of what my heart’s been going through lately and where I’m at today. Running your own business, especially while working full time seems like a lot! And it is!!! That’s actually an understatement. Coming up with a product/idea is the easy part. Throwing some paint on the walls, putting some racks in a building, filling them with clothes, and taking selfies is the easy part. But what they don’t tell you, is TRULY how difficult it is to run/own/manage/work at your business. The amount of energy, stamina, and self-awareness that you need to run a business is indescribable. But now I can say I know this first hand. I have a new-re-found respect for anyone who attempts/succeeds in running their own business. It’s a lot of work people! Working full-time in a stressful job and owning a business (and trying to have a personal life), is not aligning with what I need right now. The amount of stress I’ve experienced through learning and implementing all of the requirements to build a business left me feeling ungrounded, exhausted, unhappy and overstimulated. Being a social worker, I preach about self-care every day to my clients. But what I forgot to do, was take my own advice. My self-care and personal space went out the window. Actually, it never existed in the first place. I was “coasting,” if you will--- just trying to get done what I needed to that day, check it off the list, and do it again the next day. Don't forget---I'd have a "list" of to-do's for my SW job, business, and personal, to ensure the important things were getting done. But the sad part was, my personal needs/health were NEVER important enough to be put on the to-do list. It may have appeared that I had it all together---that things were going great…Or when I see people in the community and they ask how business is...I smile and tell them "Great!" Which isn't lying...the business is doing great. But Amber is not...All you guys see is the social media and me bopping around the store in a good mood. But in reality, I’ve been a crumbling mess—ask anyone around me. My mental health, my personal life, relationships, my youthfulness at age 25 was being compromised by this chapter in life. I began to feel increasingly more depressed and had continued health issues. A wise person told me recently, “you’re focusing more on your symptoms instead of the trigger.” When I thought more about that, the only thing that happened was it became clearer…I was focusing more on how to manage/fix the symptoms I was having; such as changing my diet, changing the way I slept, exercising more, to feel better. But what I should’ve been doing was taking a look at what was making me feel that way in the first place. And if I would’ve done that from the very beginning, I would have been able to sort through these issues a lot sooner. But everything happens for a reason—everything has a purpose. This is such a hard decision for me if you can’t tell, I haven’t even fully come out to say the words yet. If you haven’t gathered already, but Oak Tree Boutique will be closing. It’s sad and hard to say goodbye to something that I had in my life for such a short amount of time. But over the last few months, I’ve learned more than I have in my entire life. Although it's eventually lead to more headaches and heartaches, it's also brought me an immense amount of new skills, introduced to me a lot of great individuals in the community, gotten me involved in community activities, donating to good causes, and allowed me to play dress up and take selfies :)

I struggle with letting go of the business for a multitude of reasons. But one of the main reasons is the feeling of failure. Now, I know that the business is not failing. The business is making money. But it’s my pride/ego that’s feeling the failure. I have an immense amount of guilt thinking I would be a failure to my friends, family, the community, and most importantly the customers who came in to support the boutique. I kept thinking of ways I could make it work because I thought “everyone else would want me to keep it open.” “everyone will judge me if I close the business this soon.” “people will think I failed.” I know that closing this business does not make me any less of a woman, entrepreneur, or a good-hearted person, but it hasn’t gotten any easier even though I’ve made my decision.

I kept coming up with reasons why I needed Oak Tree Boutique, instead of what Oak Tree Boutique was doing for me. It’s really easy to keep “trucking along” with something because of all the kind words of encouragement, the support and kindness that’s been given to me over the last year. The truth is though, I need to stop living my life, basing all my decisions in life off of what I think other people will think of me. Or doing things because I think that’s what other people want. That’s not how you find your happiness. But it’s so very important that I follow my heart, and listen to my inner voice.... What I liked a year ago or what my interests were a year ago… Do not match up to what I like/interested in today. And the things that interest me today, aren’t going to be the same things that interest me in another two years. But that’s OK!!

Oak Tree was the biggest thing I had in my life when my life took a left, winding turn on me about seven months ago. And although I’m hoping that a customer or two are happy with their items that they received from Oak Tree, I can sit here confidently and say that I believe Oak Tree served its purpose for me. It was my support through a rough patch. It taught me what to do and what not to do in a business. It introduced me to INCREDIBLE women in this community. It was fun. It allowed me to teach my baby sister the in and outs of a business at such a young age. It gave me a sense of purpose, in its time. I think I’m at a different point in my life where I need to start living life differently. I need to stop living my life as a checklist. Go to college ✔️ get a good job✔️ have a successful business at age whatever ✔️. I need to start living, experiencing life as a 25-year-old. These are the years that I want to spend traveling and experiencing new things. Finding out my new likes and interests. Finding new hobbies. New things to keep myself busy. Enjoy my time with the people who matter or the new people that come into my life. I don’t want to have to feel like I am not able to do those things because somethings weighing me down or that I’m “too busy.” I am proud of myself for trying something new. Doing something like this was something that I didn’t think I was capable of doing. And even though I’m closing the business, or this chapter of my life that does not mean that I don’t have anything more to offer in the coming years. Even though I am sad for my decision I know it’s what’s best for me. I appreciate all of the words of encouragement and the kindness that has been given to me throughout the last year. I am very proud to have grown up in this small town, built a business, and really seeing the true hearted people in this community. If I could give advice to anyone reading this… It is to follow your heart. If you want to try something new, do it! You’d rather say “hey at least I tried,” than living your life full of “what if’s.” I think that being an entrepreneur takes a lot of courage, hard work and energy but so does creating a business/hobby that fits within your lifestyle. And if something isn’t working for you, you have to change it and you are the only one that can.

The reality is that closing a business can be a good thing and sometimes even though it’s difficult, it can be the best thing. And right now I think this is the best thing for me.

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We have a limited inventory of remaining items, so please feel free to come in the shop and get your savings on the remainder of our products. I deeply hope that you use, love, and enjoy the products we’ve provided to you over the last year. And due to the nature of the sale, all sales are final as we prepare to end the shop. No returns on past purchases either.

If you or your loved ones have unused gift certificates, please encourage them to come in and use them on the rest of the inventory. Any unused gift certificates after we close (Tentatively end of October) will not be able to be redeemed.

Punch cards will not be accepted for redemption during the closing period, but everything will be heavily discounted anyway so no one loses out!

Also, items (décor, racks, etc.) will be for sale as well! Pictures will be posted soon.

In closing, I cannot thank you enough for joining me on this journey. So many of you have cheered me on and I am deeply grateful for your support. Amber